I've written this blog to help me on my weight loss. I hope it may hope others too who are considering following a VLCD. These are my own personal views and thoughts, I have no assocation with the plans I choose to follow other than buying their products for my own personal use!

Sunday 25 November 2012

Day 60

Oh my life, what a day.  I've challenged myself this week and I think it's a challenge too far that I'm not quite fully prepared for as yet.  Which in itself is fine as it's a learning point to explore and find out more about.  Part one of my challenge is to not get weighed this week, not until weighing in day.  That part is ok, it's certainly not easy but I've moved the scales away so they don't stare at me endlessly when I'm having one of the very many loo trips necessary to flush out all this fat.  The other part is to strip back the plan and just do packs for the week.

First few days, ok, but I could feel a rebellion brewing up!  So, I decided, that today, being in the middle of my week and being a Sunday, which was always my hardest day to stay on any plan before this, that I would allow protein and veg today and extra packs if I wanted to.  It's that time of year when everyone is updating Sunday status's with talks of roast dinners, and I just allowed the idea of all that to get inside my head and strenghten my giving in muscle!  So, purchased 200g of rump steak and leeks.  I planned to eat it all in one go to get it over and done with, but couldn't face more than half the steak, so I stuck with 100g.  Had it with the leeks and a pack of mac cheese.  Then mid afternoon I fancied a wafer with a coffee, so I had one.  Then I had the rest of the steak and another mac cheese for tea, and a chocolate truffa bar.

In itself it was a sort of experiment, I've done 59 full days of this without a single cheat (apart from a small onplan overdose of smoked salmon!) and I was curious what it would be like to feel too full - before starting this journey that was my standard feeling, and I wondered if I missed it.  I have the answer to that now - NO!  It's awful, I feel sick as a dog and so darn uncomfortable!  I don't want that amount of food and I sure as heck don't need it.  So, still on plan, didn't have anything I shouldn't have, but an interesting experiment to give in to my desires and cravings in a controlled way.

Feels like I'll be staying on plan over Christmas right now, but we'll reserve a judgement on that til we get there, certainly not making any decisions right now, got another 29 days of fat shedding before that one gets here!

Monday 19 November 2012

Day 56.....

And it's just normal.  My head has changed.  I'm doing Beck and I've done the task in the next chapter before I've even got to it!  It's official weigh in in 2 days and to date this week I've lost a pound.  That's not a great deal, particularly given the low amount of calories I'm consuming, but my head is saying that it's good, its a loss, its all going in the right direction.  And that in itself is utterly amazing.  Previously I would have only lost a pound.  Now I've lost a pound so far.

I was thinking last night, I've never ever stuck with a plan for so long without cheats.  I should confess at this point that I did have a weak moment last Thursday night, and I did do a cheat, well I felt like I was doing a cheat at the time and had that associated guilt.  I bought a large pack of very fine smoked salmon (and yes, I did get it as a treat, and yes, thats entirely wrong and I do need to do some more work on that) and had some with my pack.  And it was totally delicious so I had some more..... I felt terrible afterwards, but it was a lesson to learn.  And in the grand scheme of things, it's not much of a cheat, it was on plan, I just had a bit much.  Bought some nice electronic kitchen scales yesterday and measured the rest of the salmon into 100g portions to freeze.  I was quite surprised how much of it made up 100g, I'd been guessing before - so in reality, even my one cheat wasn't as much as I thought it was - I maybe went over by ooh, say 20g!!

I'm going to set myself the challenge next week of not getting weighed.  For a whole week.  I'm going to focus on the plan, ensure I get enough water, go back to basics, 4 packs and nothing else, and no weighing in, and see what happens.  It's something unthinkable a few weeks ago, but I feel ready for it!  Seems like a silly thing, but those bathroom scales hold the key to my approach to each day - step on them and its gone down and a good day will be in store, when they've gone up, the world ends.  It's insane, but it's how it is, and it's a habit of obsession that I need to change.  So, the challenge is set, I weigh in for week 8 in 2 days time, then no more weighing til the following Thursday.  Eek!!

Tuesday 13 November 2012

Today is an amazing day

I don't quite know why but I felt it needed recording.  I'm so very happy today.  Perhaps this is the total euphoria that's been talked about, taken me a while to find it if it is!  I am smiling, can't stop smiling, so very happy!  (And anyone who knows me knows this is not normal!).

Tried on an old too small top, it looks entirely different on me and fits so well.  I'm wearing it tomorrow, it's fabulous.  Even thought I'd get out my very small dress from the wardrobe, it fits perfectly apart from my bust, and I really don't mind about that one bit.  I did some measurements a couple of days ago, and from starting LL, I've lost 21 inches from bust, waist and hips - just 3 of them from my bust, so they have clearly decided to hang about!  9 inches from my waist which is just plain daft!

I've accomplished a big task at work today, I did something I needed to do at lunchtime, and I've come home and spent an hour sorting out my spare room.  I really feel I've acheived something today.

And it's made me very very happy.  If this is my future, bring on tomorrow :))))

Wednesday 7 November 2012

Day 42

I think it could very well be the answer to the ultimate question of life, the universe and everything as today seems like a very significant day to consider what my life was like before I started with VLCD and TFL 42 days ago.  It couldn't be more different.  And what is most astonishing of all, 42 days is just a month and a half.

Back then (lol) I got up and had breakfast - reasonably healthy, poached egg on a crumpet (no butter) or a bowl of cereal with skimmed milk.  I always started the day off right.  By 9am I would be at work, having a black coffee.  And a twix.  By lunchtime I would have probably had another chocolate bar and a packet of crisps.  I'd have a reasonably healthy lunch though, so that's ok.  There might be muffins around in the afternoon, so I'd have one with a coffee, would be rude not to.  I'd get home from work and sit down, wondering what to have for tea.  It would be something reasonably healthy of course, unless I was having a treat (only about 3 or 4 nights a week) when it would be a pizza (a whole one) or maybe a chinese.  Then I'd sit down and watch tv.  Once a week I went to my Rosemary Conley class and did some exercise, and wondered why I hadn't lost any weight, cause I'd not had any butter, or cooked with fat, or had cream.  It would take me most of the week to recover from that exercise.  I was tired all the time, often I needed a nap when getting in from work, and didn't sleep well at all, waking often in the night and then struggling to wake in the morning.

During the last 42 days I have totally cleared my living room and changed all of the furniture around.  I have cleared out and cleaned all my kitchen cupboards and reorganised them, washed them all down and cleared all the hidey spots on top of them and the fridge.  I've totally cleared my spare room, painted it, wallpapered and moved my bedroom into it.  I'm half way through sorting my old bedroom into a workshop for expanding my jewellery making hobby into a little cottage business.  I've sorted all my clothes and now have piles waiting for the next ebay free listings weekend.  I've sorted my finances, sorted and renewed car insurance with better cover, sorted a new ISP and phone provider and saved money.  I run up the stairs wherever I go and feel so much happier inside.  I sleep well and wake refreshed.  I've joined a gym.  I've done this at the same time as having a full time job and a fractured arm for the first 20 days.

And bestest of all ever - I've not once fallen over from having low blood sugar, I've not once thought I may pass out from hunger, and I've not once considered "cheating".  I am very proud of me.